The confinement lady commented today that I've only observed Lilybuff taking her bath once. From her tone of voice I'm guessing its a rare occurrence in China, given that most parents fawn over their only child. I'd like to think that they are afforded the time and energy to do so because there's no older child to fight for their attention.
Honestly, I've no guilt over this. Neither child is favoured or neglected. Time in this household is divided according to individual needs, not according to meticulous calculation of 12 hrs each day per child. The priority is given in order of importance and urgency. I would love to observe Lilybuffs bathtime, be a bystander and do nothing but watch her being bathed by a perfectly capable nanny but I think Mountain Boy would benefit more from the evenings that we spend together. Similarly, I tell Mountain Boy that breastfeeding time is important to Lilybuff because she needs to eat and grow, and he respects it and backs off.
In a nutshell, the aim is to learn to respect each others needs (including parents') instead of always calculating how much time I spent w child A versus child B. In all fairness, the only way to give each child equal time is to neglect them both totally.
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