Two teeth!

The Method

Okay it should be plural because i used more than 1 method to get Mountain Boy to stop hitting Lilybuff.

Method 1: Parent/Child confrontation.

Step 1. Understand.
The "whys" and the "when" would Mountain Boy want to hit Lil. The obvious answer was because he wants needed my attention. But i realized that this was only part of the reason. Lil actually responds positively(laughs loudly) to Mountain Boy when being hit so Mountain Boy was just being the entertainer that he is.

Step 2. Acknowledge.
I say "So it's fun to hit Meimei because she laughs", or "You really want to show mama something", or "You feel that it's important for me to see what you are doing"....

Wait for him to agree.

Step 3. State why his behavior is hurting his sister, and if possible state how you as a parent feel.
"When you hit your sister, it will cause her pain and that makes me feel upset", Or "When you play with your sister this way, I am worried that you may hurt her". INSTEAD OF "You are hurting her!" or "Stop being so naughty".



Method 2: Storytelling (As in story TELLING, not reading aloud or showing them picture books).

The power of storytelling is just amazing. I've had the pleasure of meeting this Chinese parenting expert who wrote a number of parenting books, and she was sharing about a recent book that she had written on the benefits of storytelling and pedagogical stories. Through stories, children build a sense of imagination and it is very effective in passing on values to them. I was encourage to make up my own stories and i've been conjuring a whole series for Mountain Boy. I really mean to write them down for keepsake. But this series I call "The adventures of Baby Bird and Meimei Bird" is the one that i've been consistently telling to help nurture his sense of responsibility as an older brother.

I've always known that storytelling is powerful but this time i was really inspired. Mountain Boy responds very well to the stories, he even contributes his own details! Sometimes he surprises me by requesting a particular story even though i just kinda made it up on the fly (this silly one on The Tractor and The Cow).

Anyway i'll share the stories soon.

What I've been up to

I've not been blogging extensively these days except for the occasional uploads from my iPhone. I have 2 kids, the connection is slow, and i've been too busy baking.

All of that and...

At the beginning of May, I took an instructor course for P.E.T (Parent Effectiveness Training) which lasted till early June. In order for my instructor certification to be complete, i needed to conduct my first course and i've wasted no time at doing that. So right after the instructor course i organized my first set of participants (thanks to supportive friends) and it's currently ongoing. So yes. I've been so bloody busy.

The instructor course came about because i was at my wits' end with Mountain Boy. Remember the incident where i slapped him? Even though I told myself that it was ok, i knew it really wasn't. Then i came across an email from my P.E.T instructor saying she was conducting a follow-up session on bullying. I attended the thinking that i'd get nods for administering corporal punishment given that my circumstance was "unusual". But NO...  (Hitting story to be continued)

Then i was informed that the instructor training was happening so i decided to just do it.  It's not like i have aim in my life. During the course, my conviction of the method grew along with a deeper understanding of the principles behind it. I was also driven to do my own research on child development and i've been reading a lot of enriching books that i can't wait to share.

It's been a transformational 2 months. Mountain Boy is no longer hitting Lilybuff, and i did it without anyone getting hurt. In fact, Mountain Boy has been the sweetest big brother! I will share my method in the next post.

Oh Lily....

She turned 7 months last week. She is not terribly fond of physical activities (that's my girl!), she is quite contented just lying on her back.

We have a winner (recipe updated)

After 6 different vanilla cupcake recipes, I've found the one. Perfectly moist n crumbly. A tad sweet but that's easily fixed. Recipe coming up shortly.

Okay let me qualify. I think this recipe will be a great base for further flavoring. Can add 1-2 tablespoons of match powder, or fill it with cream etc because it's more moist. I think in terms of texture and appearance, the magnolia bakery vanilla cupcake rivals this and probably taste better on it's own (i.e. without additional flavoring). 

Perfect Vanilla Cupcakes

Recipe by Glorious Treats

Yields- 15-16 cupcakes

1 1/4 cups cake flour

1 1/4 teaspoons baking powder

1/2 teaspoon baking soda

1/2 teaspoon salt

2 eggs

3/4 cup sugar

1 1/2 teaspoons pure vanilla extract

1/2 cup oil (vegetable, canola or extra light olive oil)

1/2 cup buttermilk

(or 1/2 cup milk plus 1/2 teaspoon white vinegar or lemon juice- add acid to the milk then set aside for 5 minutes before using)

Directions-

* Preheat oven to 350*F.

* In a medium bowl, add cake flour, baking powder, baking soda and salt.  Stir together with whisk, and set aside.

* In the bowl of an electric mixer, add eggs and beat 10-20 seconds.  Add sugar and continue to beat on medium speed about 30 seconds.  Add vanilla and oil, beat.

* Reduce mixer speed to low and slowly add about half of the flour mixture.  Add half of the milk, then the rest of the flour and the rest of the milk.  Beat until just combined.  Scrap down the side of the bowl.

* The batter will be thin.   Pour batter into a muffin pan prepared with paper liners.  Fill liners about 2/3 full.

* Bake cupcakes in pre-heated oven for 12-14 minutes.

* Cool in pan 1-2 minutes, then remove cupcakes from pan (carefully) and finish cooling on a wire rack.

* Frost as desired when fully cool. 

* Feel free to use this recipe for a cake as well.  The recipe above will work for a 6″ cake.  Double the recipe for an 8″ or 9″ cake.

* A note about Cake Flour-  Cake Flour has a lower protein content than traditional all-purpose flour, which results in a more tender, delicate crumb in the finished product.  If you can not find or access cake flour, feel free to substitute as necessary, but your results will vary from the original recipe.

Happy 7 months Liz!

DIY play dough

Basic ingredient ratios:
2 cups flour
2 cups warm water
1 cup salt
2 Tablespoons vegetable oil
1 Tablespoon cream of tartar (optional for improved elasticity)

food coloring (liquid, powder, or unsweetened drink mix)
scented oils

Instructions:
Just put everything in pot and bring to boil. stir continuously until liquid hardens into dough. knead to smoothen.