Method 1: Parent/Child confrontation.
Step 1. Understand.
The "whys" and the "when" would Mountain Boy want to hit Lil. The obvious answer was because he
Step 2. Acknowledge.
I say "So it's fun to hit Meimei because she laughs", or "You really want to show mama something", or "You feel that it's important for me to see what you are doing"....
Wait for him to agree.
Step 3. State why his behavior is hurting his sister, and if possible state how you as a parent feel.
"When you hit your sister, it will cause her pain and that makes me feel upset", Or "When you play with your sister this way, I am worried that you may hurt her". INSTEAD OF "You are hurting her!" or "Stop being so naughty".
Method 2: Storytelling (As in story TELLING, not reading aloud or showing them picture books).
The power of storytelling is just amazing. I've had the pleasure of meeting this Chinese parenting expert who wrote a number of parenting books, and she was sharing about a recent book that she had written on the benefits of storytelling and pedagogical stories. Through stories, children build a sense of imagination and it is very effective in passing on values to them. I was encourage to make up my own stories and i've been conjuring a whole series for Mountain Boy. I really mean to write them down for keepsake. But this series I call "The adventures of Baby Bird and Meimei Bird" is the one that i've been consistently telling to help nurture his sense of responsibility as an older brother.
I've always known that storytelling is powerful but this time i was really inspired. Mountain Boy responds very well to the stories, he even contributes his own details! Sometimes he surprises me by requesting a particular story even though i just kinda made it up on the fly (this silly one on The Tractor and The Cow).
Anyway i'll share the stories soon.
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